My buddy Biggs has a house on 71st he’s rented for the summer with like 7 or so other guys. So we decided we’d head to OC after he gets off work. On the way, we picked up Jim and Rob (who remind me of Kenny vs. Spenny on Comedy Central). We get there around 3 AM and run into Beetle and Max, who were already there and wasted. I’m talking squinty eyed, blindfold me with dental floss wasted. So we stayed up and watched the sun rise while drinking some beers. Someone mentioned that is was senior week. And since it was my 40th birthday, I was promptly given the nickname “Uncle Bad Touch” for the duration.
After catching a few hours sleep, the first place we hit for drinks was Seacrets. Right from the start, this was a pretty fun place. I caught a couple boffing in one of the outside bathrooms and met some pretty cool people. The waitstaff were friendly (they went drinking wth us later) and our waiter Mike looks like a super young Tom Cruise. He was a good sport and put up with us busting his balls over the Tom Cruise thing. I’m sure he’s heard that about a billion fucking times. Thing were going pretty well and then it happened. A forshadowing of all things to come: The Cockblock. If it wasn’t a gf doing it to us, then we were doing it to ourselves. For the rest of the week, it was like the Cockblock Olympics. LOL
We hit Fager’s Island later that night. Overall that was pretty fun. There was some out of control drunk guy dancing like a complete retard. The only incident that night was an overzealous, young pup of a bouncer who had no clue about public domain photography laws. He promptly got ignored.
Next night we hit the club part of Seacrets. The Benjamins were playing and were joined for a set by the Amish Outlaws. Jim apprently has wet dreams about the Amish so he went and talked to them and hung out for a while.
Our final night was spent at the Poolbar. If you’re looking for extremely hot, but coked out Russian chicks, then this is the place for you. The place was fairly beat and they cancelled the bikini contest that night due to the thin crowd. The storms were so bad that night, that only idiotic hardcore drunks like ourselves were foolish enough to brave them.
Finally a special hello to our bus stalkers. We kept running into this group of 4 girls who were up there for senior week. They had all gotten alcohol citations because they threw some guy out of their house and he pulled one of the biggest of all bitch moves and called the cops on them. Nice going, douchebag. Your Man Card has been revoked.
Most Notable Quotes:
“It stinks like man sex in here.”
“I’m not telling you my name!!!!”
“That’s a really nice vest.”
“Shots fired!”
“Pedophile?!?! That’s an awfully big word for an 8 year old…”
I’m still sorting through all the pix. Give me time. They’ll be up soon.
